I'm fat as fuck and bitter...

And I'm kinda drunk right now.

I really wanna bring back the fuck-you MySpace blogs from back in the day.

Can I get a wut wut?

Rocking the WW

My favorite treat is ice cream. McDonalds vanilla cone or low-fat ice cream. Was feeling hungry so I just nommed on a skinny-cow ice cream sandwich. It was delicious. Have been kicking ass on the Weight Watchers. I'm on week 4 with three months before the June... I have lost 15.8 pounds and I am going full-speed ahead. The weight loss is slow but speeding :P

My clothes feel looser... significantly. I am about 16.3 pounds away from my first goal of getting my ass under 300 lbs. I'll get there. I want to get there sooner than later, but it took me a while to puff up when I gained all my weight back. I am being more active, especially with utilizing my gym membership. Gym changed venues because 24-Hour Shitness decided not to continue their franchise in Salinas and a newer, better, gym took over my contract. Very very nice. Can't wait till they get their jacuzzi installed.

The one mantra that I'm living by is that I gotta burn more calories than I ingest. I'm really trying my ass off. That whole thing they talk about at the WW meetings, as far as mentally rehearsing, is what is working for me. Today, someone bought Round Table Pizza for lunch and I ate only one slice (at 8 points) with a salad to fill me up. I ate out at this work-related dinner and made sure to fill up half my plate with the steamed greens and salad, while also being mindful of my portions. I was able to tally things up right and I'm not regretful for my eating behaviors.

Just a quick note: I've given up posting my deepest thoughts on the internet... blocked or not, I am afraid that they will come back and bite me in the ass. The closest thing I got going is micro-blogging, which I am good at instantaneously lamenting my disdain.

I am in love with my girlfriend. She is a huge motivator for me. I want to look good for her, make her look good, and be healthy so that I can enjoy my time with her. She is a sweetheart and I know she loves me. I can't wait to move in with her, though I have my fears. We still have a lot of things to work out before I am fully set on making her my betrothed. While my girlfriend is not a Christian, thus not sharing my faith, she is also not a whore or hypocrite. I'll take that straight to the bank.

My mood is good. Getting organized and losing the weight is definitely going to affect my happiness... positively affecting it. That's really, all I want.

The bitch went nuts...

holy fucking shit.... seriously now. (Ben Folds lyrics... go download [itunes] this song.)

So my day went alright. I woke up super early at milady's house due to not being able to sleep well last night, got dressed and got to work super early, relatively speaking. I swung by my pad to pick up one of my favorite sbux coffee mugs, cook oatmeal, and pack some food for work today. I worked seven hours straight and took my lunch to round out hour eight. 

While at work, it was good times. I managed to get in contact with my little bro, who is in Puerto Vallarta, Mexico and managed to call me "fag" from 4,000 miles away over instant messenger... what an age we live in. Me and the sistah I work with had a good time gossiping. I'm hella good at that. I got some serious work done. Like, serious cat, serious work.

While at work, I was really good about my eating, minus the hot chocolate I had this morning (12 points! wtf!?) which did nothing to enhance my much needed Monday-morning-caffeine high I so desperately needed. I had about three cups of watermelon, a WW Smartone lunch dinner, and some coffee (with no Twinkies). All in all, it was good eating.

Due to me getting the fuck out of there early, I went to the gym to use the membership I dished out for a few months ago and do an hour on the eliptical. It was good times. I met up with LouLou from work and I had a great time just chit-chatting. I got home and ate a plate, half-filled with (once-frozen) mixed vegetables and a cup of Rice a Roni. Still having some FLEX(c) POINTS(also-(c)) left, I decided that I was going to nurture this craving for coffee - a soy caramel macchiato. So I go to get it and I literally shit my pants (not literally, but my heart drops).